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Next Week: Hair |
January 26-February 1, 1998
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Welcome to another week of HoleCity,<LIE> the mostpopular destination on the web.</LIE>
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New! Don't miss the fun page, its back.
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I Wanna Hold Your... The Associated Press reported yesterday that Volkswagen is trying to lure John Lennon from the grave in order to schlock merchandise. That's right, the company that brought you the Rabbit is now humping like a bunny, pitching woo to George Harrison, Paul McCartney, Ringo Starr and, presumably, the ghost of Mr. Lennon. This March, the auto maker is re-releasing its '70s trashmobile, the Beetle, and thus wants some marketing help from at least the surviving trio. Harrison and Starr, whose careers suck, might listen. McCartney, whose tours are routinely sponsored by Miller Lite, Nike and Depends Undergarments, will likely draw up the papers. No word yet on Lennon. Evidently VW wants to "evoke the Woodstock era" with its old/new brand. No word on whether that means no one at any of the company's manufacturing plants will shampoo for seven years. |
1.30.98
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"...one image comes to mind: Puffy Combs doing the White Man's Overbite on the grave of Biggie Smalls. |
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"Everything since then, the world tours, the Pope-mobile, the intolerant attitude toward gays and female priests...it's all been a ruse. A perfectly executed ruse." |
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"...squint hard enough and Mike Holmgren starts looking like John Madden. But without the pork chop stains." |
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"First, they continue to run that embarrassing spot featuring Augie Busch III where he says, "I taste the beer ever day," and then hiccups." |
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"Hollywood lives by the old credo "Cocaine, Alcohol, Bacon. Choose any two."" |
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TV Guide calls it "...a weekly classic. Right up there with Family Circus." |
